With MegaStorm Barney due to flatten the entire United Kingdom tomorrow, (I can see the headlines: SEVERE WEATHER WARNING, THOUSANDS OF ANGLERS CALL IN SICK AT WORK IN ORDER TO FISH IN MISERABLE CONDITIONS) I took advantage of the last 2 hours of daylight today by driving to the Shropshire Union Basin in Chester and dibbling for big perch with big lobworm.
All I can say is that I’m in awe of the specimen anglers who regularly catch big predators on worm and lures. I didn’t even get a nibble. An hour stalking the canal and all I achieved was to hasten the demise of four innocent lobworms. I have much to learn. And so it was thusly that I went on the Internet and looked up “Perch Fishing with Lobworm” and discovered that I should have injected my lobworms with air. It was not enough for me to merely impale them on my hook, I had to give them The Bends as well. It appears that Perch, which I thought were greedy sods, are actually light eaters. (Air Joke). I personally think injecting air into a Garden Friendly worm is disgusting and inhumane and evil but of course I will purchase a Lobworm Syringe because we anglers will commit all sorts of atrocities in order to catch fish. Here is a cross-section of a worm:
It’s almost human! It has a bladder, an intestine and nerves too. Just like us. But, my mind is made up, I will have to inject an almost-fellow-human-being with air in order to catch fish because those of us who are drawn to fishing cannot let almost-humanity stand in our way. That being said, I will only be able to do this once Super Mega Storm Barney has smashed its way through the United Kingdom and the long process of rebuilding the country has been completed. This Wednesday, perhaps? Thursday at the latest if the rebuilding is delayed.